distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
