I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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