You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
