I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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