im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i love accidental penises.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I think a kid would responsible me up
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
