Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
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After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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