Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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