Please don't use social media to get back at me.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
