Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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