I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
