I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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