then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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