At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
you made out with another girl for some wings
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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