I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Redeem this text for a blowjob
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
