The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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