Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
