My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
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I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
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her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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