That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
40s are totally the cure
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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