I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
