Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(518): View more from New York

i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno

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(518): i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno http://tfl.nu/fv58

Replies (29) Good night (554) Bad night (2886)
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(914): View more from New York

Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.

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(914): Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore. http://tfl.nu/9xwr

Replies (44) Good night (4048) Bad night (1240)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"

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(401): You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk" http://tfl.nu/xogg

Replies (13) Good night (6158) Bad night (1038)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny

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(304): As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny http://tfl.nu/vl4i

Replies (15) Good night (4138) Bad night (1065)
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(253): View more from Washington

Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.

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(253): Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me. http://tfl.nu/6zni

Replies (28) Good night (1866) Bad night (5462)
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(678): View more from Georgia

He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it

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(678): He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it http://tfl.nu/jk9d

Replies (18) Good night (9705) Bad night (1061)
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(214): View more from Texas

Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.

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(214): Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing. http://tfl.nu/4y7p

Replies (9) Good night (6097) Bad night (1236)
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(256): View more from Alabama

hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by

(256): View more from Alabama

he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch

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(256): hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by (256): he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch http://tfl.nu/0lqj

Replies (13) Good night (2043) Bad night (691)
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(714): View more from California

So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.

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(714): So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions. http://tfl.nu/jiu6

Replies (5) Good night (1844) Bad night (460)
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(914): View more from New York

Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck

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(914): Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck http://tfl.nu/xehn

Replies (2) Good night (2362) Bad night (417)
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(916): View more from California

Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.

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(916): Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities. http://tfl.nu/3rzs

Replies (4) Good night (1454) Bad night (461)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge

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(404): I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge http://tfl.nu/wfh9

Replies (1) Good night (718) Bad night (303)
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(646): View more from New York

I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea

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(646): I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea http://tfl.nu/a1ln

Replies (7) Good night (411) Bad night (639)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.

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(336): Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups. http://tfl.nu/v7i7

Replies (6) Good night (841) Bad night (360)
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(206): View more from Washington

We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.

(425): View more from Washington

It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze

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(206): We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though. (425): It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze http://tfl.nu/aqsr

Replies (1) Good night (650) Bad night (294)

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