Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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