Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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