The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
