Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
3 2 1 whiskey
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
