He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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