I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
