I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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