I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize