Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
The air was thick with penises
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
