Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
