Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
