The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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