I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
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They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize