I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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