i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
This baby is an asshole
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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