when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
