I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize