just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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