all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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