carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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