I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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