Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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