ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
