how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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