his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.