Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
4 words: hood of his car
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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