i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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