Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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