I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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