My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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