I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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